found this fun site to make word clouds… and when I typed in my blog this is how it turned out. Fun 
In the depths of my heart…
no longer “free”…FOUR baby!
My “baby” boy Hudson hit a big milestone this Monday (or a big milestone for this momma anyway;). He isn’t “free” anymore…he is now the big FOUR!!
I don’t know why FOUR seems like such a big number to me – but wow, it does. It’s no longer a baby or a toddler. As he often let’s me know, he’s a big kid now. A big kid with a big personality . He is strong-willed and sometimes makes this momma oh so tired, but I admire how strong he is. And I have no desire to break his will – I pray I can gracefully raise a boy who’s “strong will” becomes a strong self-motivated man of integrity.
I am so proud and just plain happy to be this boy’s momma!! His giggle is infectious, his hugs and kisses make me melt. He seems to have a very intuitive spiritual gift. I love you Hudson Isaac Elder from here to the moon!! Happy Happy Birthday sweet pea!
Two Hands…
We spent ALL of Saturday celebrating this little man. Daddy came over and we all went to breakfast. I pulled out some candles (which quickly had to be narrowed down to a single candle for his pancakes and we all sang Happy Birthday to him. Afterwards we went to Buffalo Nickel to play games and mini-golf. Then we took the boys to a hibachi restaurant for lunch – where they had a blast!! The chefs are, of course, extremely entertaining. Ian’s favorite part was the explosive volcano he made out of a stack of onions.
I could never put into words what it feels like to be this boy’s momma…
He is smart and witty. He is sensitive and loving. He is a perfectionist (which he did NOT get from me;). He is ridiculously handsome…I mean just look above!! and he’s already girl crazy…sigh
I remember the literal burst of what can only be described as “love” I could feel in my chest the moment I saw his little body for the first time. I cannot explain what it is like to hold your child for the first time… it is like having your heart outside of your body.
….and now 6…SIX years later….(wipe tears away) – that’s TWO HANDS people!!! It takes two hands for my little man to show you how old he is.
as hard as it is to let him grow up, I absolutely love watching each step he takes! I get to be a part of his journey…gently (and sometimes not so gently;) guiding his way, praying all along the way that I carry a light strong enough for him to follow. I could not be more proud of this boy who made me a momma for the first time! I love you Ian Micah Elder!!! Happy Birthday sweet boy, I love you from here to the moon!
Soccer days
Both of the boys tried their feet at soccer this fall (I know…bad pun. I can’t help it;) Ian was on the team Blue Lightening. He absolutely LOVED everything about the sport – especially the socializing on the sideline and snacks after the game! He really did have a blast playing. His super sweet coach, Lisa, taught him a lot and was very patient with the kiddos. We are taking a break this spring, while he is taking Spanish and Hudson will play t-ball, but he is SO ready to kick it back up again in the fall!!
Hudson’s team was called the Lil’ Geckos and they were SUPER cute to watch. The 3 year old division is co-ed so Hudson only had one other little boy on his team and they were instant friends. If you have never watched 3 year olds try to play an organized sport…I HIGHLY recommend it! It will make your day! Besides the obvious of making goals for the opposite team, they will often just decide to sit down and take a break or run after an airplane they see in the sky.
Soccer days are some of my sweetest memories…
It melts this momma’s heart to see my boys learning and playing and making new friends. How innocent and just plain FUN life is for and with them!
They completely fill my heart.
They should be in pictures…
For Christmas this year, Nathan took a bazillion photos of the boys for us to have framed for Grammy. I plan on framing several for myself also They turned out SOOOOO good!!! Thank you uncle Nathan for starting them at such an early age…they literally pause and pose every time they hear the click of a camera! These are just a few of my favorites…
If you would like to see the rest of the bazillion photos you can check them out here.
Meet Robert
This year our home adopted the infamous Elf on the Shelf tradition. I have a few friends who have done this is the past and this year (maybe due to the hype of pinterest) it seems to be a everywhere. For those of you who aren’t aware of The Elf on the Shelf – this creepy little elf comes with a book about how he flies back to santa each evening while the kiddos are asleep and reports on all that has happened during the day. Then in the morning the elf is in a new “hiding” place. You, as a family, get to name the elf and even register his adoption online. My boys chose the name “Robert” – I can’t help but laugh every time I think about it. It just doesn’t seem like a very “elfy” name but hey, Robert has found a place in our home and we love him. Sometimes he gets into some playful mischief when he comes back to the house in the morning. i.e – hanging all of the boys underwear on the christmas tree or having a snowball fight with marshmallows. The boys LOVED waking up each morning and seeing where Robert was. There is really only one BIG rule when it comes to your elf on the shelf – you mustn’t touch him!! If you do, he could lose his magic. So…what happens one morning when Robert was enjoying a nice warm mug of hot chocolate and had a marshmallow in his hand??! You guessed it – he was touched (gasp). After a 3 day hiatus, Robert returned to us one day after school with a bandaged hand (aka the marshmallow hand that was too tempting not to touch) and this letter.
We had a lot of fun with Robert…in fact, Hudson still asks almost every day if Robert is hiding somewhere. Which, now that I think about it, may be because he wants to be on guard for if Robert is back….he told me one morning when I was getting onto him about not brushing his teeth that, “I hate that dumb doll!! He tell on me ’bout ebryding!” – don’t worry!!! if the creepiness starts to outweigh the fun I’ll “shelf” Robert for good
a reason to celebrate
I celebrate birthdays (especially my kid’s) because I am so thankful for them! Because celebrating a life is always joyous and birthday cake is yummy.
I celebrate thanksgiving because it’s so nice to spend time with my family and eat yummy food and love on each other.
I celebrate halloween because I LOVE the decorations, and costumes, and candy .
I celebrate fridays because it’s the end of a work week and I’m usually exhausted by then.
I celebrate mondays because I am thankful I have a job to go to.
I celebrate christmas – not because I think that is the exact date that Jesus was born (because I don’t) – I celebrate christmas and/or the holiday season because if there is any time of year where people take the time to be with each other and give to others (whatever the reason) I’m gonna take it!! plus I think santa is fun- and I LOVE having fun!! I feel confident in my job as a parent making sure my kids don’t mistake santa as anything other than FUN!
I celebrate my belief in Christ always! and if making time to be together and love on one another is made a bigger deal on december 25th – then yea!! I don’t care as much about the semantics…I care about people and our time here!! I’m gonna enjoy it!!
In Everything Give Thanks…
I LOVE my family….
We always laugh…a lot…when we are together! Randomly yet not surprisingly, this fur coat made the rounds that day. (my sweet grandma parted with her lovely fur coat to help us help others stay warm this winter…thank you grandma! and EVERYONE who donated!! you are awesome!)
Thanksgiving (most holidays in general actually;) always bring back some memorable moments for me…playing games with our family, sitting at the kids table, graduating to the grown up table, then later babysitting the kids table…singing, watching old home movies, telling hilarious and most definitely embarrassing stories! In all of this memory making, my brother has shared it beside me. I can remember years where he was my “annoying” little brother and years where I don’t know what I would do if he wasn’t there right next to me. We can look at each other and know what the other is thinking.
Watching my boys makes my heart so happy – how their relationship grows and changes. How Ian gets so annoyed with Hudson sometimes…how Hudson wants to do everything the way Ian does…how they will ask to talk to each other on the phone when littlest man has to stay with Grammy on Thursday nights…how they are partners in crime when it comes to sneaking sweets from the fridge…how Ian tries to teach Hudson how to write his name and encourage him when he gets frustrated… and how they will giggle in their beds at night and always tell each other they love each other before falling asleep… <3
…more than thankful….
my boys – they are my good morning, my scrambling to make lunches, my running out the door, my always forgetting something, my purse full of cars and stickers and spare underwear, my mid-day smiles, me end of day hugs, my constant messes, my achy bones at the end of the day, my goodnight prayers, they are my HEART …and I am more than thankful
my family – they are my foundation, my “now I know why you’re crazy”, my hilarious childhood stories and mishaps, my chicken Johnny, my unconditional and always there, my love and support system, they are my heritage…and I am more than thankful
my friends – they are my arms to fall into, my laugh until it hurts, my honest answers, my place to vent, my feet when I can’t stand, my “I know what you’re thinking” expressions, my accept me always, my silly moments, my stupid “what if” games, my soul sisters (and brothers;), they are my safe place…and I am more than thankful
my home – it is my shelter, my sink full of dirty dishes and clothes on the floor, my refrigerator of sweet drawings, my door frame of how fast my boys grow, my unfinished projects, my boys playground, my first home as a family, my constant needing to fix something…but it’s ours and it holds a million bazillion memories…and I am more than thankful
my truck – it is my point A to point B, my prayer room on the way to work, a lost sippy cup under the seat, my time to catch up with friends on the phone, my kids aggravating each other because they’re too close, my tailgate to sit on and reminisce, my dad’s things still in the consoles…and on rainy days, sometimes it still smells like him…and I am more than thankful
my job – it is my constant for the last 11 years, it is pivotal moments in time, it is my first group of amazing kids who are now in college or old enough to be, it is tons of mistakes and learning moments, it is a letter or visit from former students just when you wonder why you do this job, it is never forgetting a single child that sat in front of me, it is loving every one of them, it is a continuous battle, it is food and shelter for my kids, it is some of my closest friends, it is the ache in my heart to make a difference…and I am more than thankful
my past – it is my map – every guided or misguided step; it is my best choice, it is my worst mistake, it is my shoebox of letters from camp, it is my thousands of photos with friends, it is my movie ticket stub from a first date, it is a song or smell that makes me feel like I am there, it is my laughing until it hurts, it is breathing deep in the quiet and the ache for what was or could’ve been…it is my painful and incredibly beautiful story…and I am more than thankful
my mom – she is my always there, she is my inherited neurotic behavior, she is my boy’s sugar grammy, she is making sure you have clean underwear before you leave…still, she is my give me the coat off her back, she is silly combined phrases like “squoonch over”, she is my “how I met my Jesus”, she is my life long friend…and I am more than thankful
my dad – he is my gone too soon, he is my sense of humor, he is my childhood bedtime stories, he is my free spirit, he is the laugh i can still hear, he is my addiction to mexican food, he is my love of music, he is in my boy’s soul, he is my “sunshine”…and i am more than thankful
my brother – he is my kindred spirit, my no words needed, he is my protector, he is my sounding board, he is my annoying preteen years, he is a thousand memories, he is my knows my thoughts with just a look, he is my finish each other’s sentences, he is my other half…and I am more than thankful
my time – it is my take for granted, it is my never enough, it is my long days and short years, it is staring at my babies while they sleep, it is separation from those who have already passed, it is my fear, it is what i cling to, it is my sacred moments, it is my wild ride, it is my healing wounds, it is my joyous heart…and I am more than thankful
my faith – it is my family, it is my praise in the storm, it is a thousand questions why, it is always knowing, it is my not understanding, it is my aching heart, it is overwhelming peace, it is a longing filled, it is my strength when I have no idea how, it’s the promise I believe down deep in my core, it is seeing my dad again…and I am more than thankful
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Rachel
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